As a Catholic reared in a predominantly Catholic Italian and Irish suburb of New York City, I basically grew up believing that the terms Catholic and Christian were synonyms. It wasn’t until history class in high school that I learned about other types of Christians like Protestants and Orthodox, and it wasn’t until I attended college in the heart of the evangelical south that I realized that there were entire denominations of Christians who were sincerely mystified by the elaborate Catholic rituals that I was brought up to love and appreciate. That doesn’t begin to cover the large numbers of non-Christians that are probably similarly baffled by our quaint Catholic devotions.
This post isn’t intended to convert anyone, to argue with any person of different religious persuasions (or no religious persuasions). It’s just a guide to what Catholics do during Lent and why, because, from an outsider’s perspective, I’m sure that the weirdness commences on Ash Wednesday when we come to work or school with dark splotches on our foreheads and continues every Friday with us scowling down at our lunch of PB&J as we fervently wish it was a ham and cheese sandwich. In a nutshell, the purpose of this post is to help non-Catholics understand the confusing world that Catholics inhabit and to give them useful tips to prevent them from putting their foot in their mouth when they speak to Catholics this Lent. There are over one billion of us with varying degrees of devotion in the world, so for a bit of insight into our wackiness I answer the subsequent FAQ’s and offer the following tips. Feel free to submit questions if you are still confused by any Catholic Lenten customs, and I’ll do my best to clarify some of our more peculiar ancient traditions. Now, getting down to business:
What is this Lent that you speak of? Is it another word for lint that I need to vacuum or something?
Nope, Lent is not another term for lint, but it does involve a sort of spring cleaning, so you’re on the right track if your mind went to vacuuming. Lent is a forty-day period of the Catholic liturgical calendar devoted to soul cleansing, repentance, and turning back to the Lord. Lent starts on Ash Wednesday and goes through Holy Thursday. Following Lent, there is the Triduum that includes Holy Thursday, Good Friday, and Holy Saturday. When Triduum ends, Easter Sunday arrives to the delight of Catholics the worldwide. Many Catholics commemorate Lent by fasting, donating to charities, attending the sacrament of Reconciliation, and giving up some treat or indulgence to connect with Jesus’ suffering on behalf of sinful humanity. This quick video provides a succinct and visual description of Lent, so you might find it enjoyable and informative.
Why forty days? Is that a totally arbitrary number or is there a deeper spiritual significance?
As homage to the forty days that Jesus spent in the desert in the Gospels and the forty years that the Israelites spent in the desert as depicted in the book of Exodus, Lent is forty days long. Therefore, it is not an arbitrary number, but rather a number selected for its religious symbolism within the heritage of Catholicism.
Why do you have ashes on your forehead? Don’t you know it looks like you forgot to take a shower?
Catholics go to a church service to receive ashes on their forehead on Ash Wednesday, the opening day of Lent, in order to demonstrate their sorrow for their sinfulness, re-commit their lives to Jesus to start a holy season that they pray will bring them closer to Christ, and to gain a reminder of their own mortality. When ashes are rubbed on a Catholic’s forehead by a priest or a deacon, the Catholic is either instructed to repent and believe in the Gospel or else to remember that we come from dust and we’ll return to dust.
Are ashes a sign that you consider yourself holier than others?
No way. It’s actually a sign of the opposite, because any Catholic walking around with ashes on his or her forehead is admitting that he or she is a sinner in need of God’s saving grace. Ashes indicate that a Catholic is sorry for his or her sins and is dedicated himself or herself to following the Gospel. They do not suggest that a Catholic thinks that he or she is better than anybody not walking around with ashes. Please don’t interpret this ancient religious behavior as snobbery when it is actually an act of abasement. It’s intended to be no more arrogant than kneeling or praying.
Why do you fast on Good Friday? Are you trying to starve yourself?
Catholics fast on Good Friday as a reminder of the pain Jesus endured on the Cross for all of humanity’s sake. The Catholic isn’t trying to starve any more than a Muslim fasting during Ramadan is attempting to die of hunger. The Catholic’s focus is on getting closer to God by focusing on the needs of the spirit rather than on the desires of the flesh. For this day, food takes a backseat to prayer. On days of fasting, it is also traditional to devote any money that would have otherwise gone to food to charity.
Why do you give up chocolate or coffee? Are you on some weird diet?
Catholics aren’t trying to lose weight by avoiding an indulgence like chocolate or coffee. This is just another small way that Catholics can show their repentance for their sins during Lent and can attempt to pay more attention to God by turning away from more physical desires to key in on more spiritual needs. That’s why you shouldn’t be offended if you offer us a Twix and we refuse you with a sad mutter about Lent. It’s nothing personal. It’s just our religion trying to build up our appetite for chocolate Easter eggs and bunnies.
Why can’t you eat meat on Fridays during Lent? Are you temporarily vegetarian?
Abstaining from meat on Friday is a typical penitential act during Lent, so you will see Catholics packing meatless lunches on that day, or else going with fish, since fish is not classified as a meat. You will also probably see some Catholics groaning when they realize that it’s Friday and all they have is a bologna sandwich for lunch, a sight that might provoke amusement and confusion in an outsider, but will invariably draw forth a sympathetic and similar story from a fellow Catholic. You’ll also see Catholics abstaining from meat on Ash Wednesday even though it isn’t a Friday, because it is a day devoted to fasting and repentance.
Got any tips on dealing with Catholics during Lent?
Of course I do. Here are some ways that you can avoid creating awkward moments with a Catholic during Lent:
1) Don’t point and stare at the ashes on our foreheads on Ash Wednesday. We know that Ash Wednesday can be a bit of a “Spot the Catholic” day because we’ve all got these black dots on our foreheads like bullets, so we feel vulnerable to mockery, since we understand that America is a historically Protestant country. It’s as much a faux pas to gape at our ashes as it is to gawk at a yamaka, so just appreciate diversity and be grateful that your religion doesn’t require you to walk around with ashes on your forehead.
2) Don’t tell us that we’ve got something on our forehead during Ash Wednesday. We are well aware that we have ashes there, since we stood on a long line to get them at a service devoted to that express purpose.
3) If you know that we are giving up coffee or chocolate, don’t try to tempt us into eating these treats. Support us in what our conscience requires of us in this regard rather than seeking to undermine us, just as you would encourage a friend who was abstaining from dessert as part of a diet. Think of us as on a spiritual diet, instead of a weight one.
4) Don’t ask us if we want to go out to eat at a steakhouse on a Friday during Lent. It leads us to sin and cardiac arrest.
5) If we ask you whether eggs count as meat, the correct answer is no.
6) If we ask you if fish counts as a meat, the correct answer is also no.
7) If we moan about having to eat a peanut butter sandwich instead of a turkey one on Friday, just nod sympathetically and don’t expect a satisfactory response about why eating meat on a Friday in Lent is verboten for Catholics, since much of Catholicism is beautifully mystical and inexplicable. At least half of Catholicism is a celebration of our ignorance as human beings, and if you remember that when you’re dealing with our religious practices, a lot more will become clear to you.
8) If our sandwich smells suspiciously like tuna, just wrinkle up your nose and suffer with us. It builds up blessings for you in heaven and strengthens your stomach.
Are there any more in-depth, theological videos on Lent out there for me to enjoy?
Certainly, thanks for asking. Mother Angelica, a well-known Catholic radio theologian, offers an interesting and intelligent lecture on Lent and Ash Wednesday that I think would be informative to Catholics and non-Catholics alike. Bishop Egan also recently published a gripping analysis of the pilgrimage that the first week of Lent represents. The archbishop of Philadelphia also has a shorter, nine minute, reflection on the meaning of Lent and why Catholics participate in rituals of fasting and repentance. Hopefully, these links offer Catholics and non-Catholics alike some grounding in the more intellectual avenues of Catholicism.
This all sounds too intense for me. Are there any simpler explanations of Lent out there?
Yep. I’d recommend checking out a copy of Catholicism for Dummies (but not the Idiot’s Guide to Catholicsm, since that book is notoriously inaccurate), because it is easy to read and very reliable. For the best possible insight into what the Catholic Church teaches and why, you can access the Catechism of the Catholic Church online for free.
glimpsesfromanivorytower 
no thanks… religion followers basically are maniacal.